Custody and Your Ex’s New Partner

ChocolateOne of the hardest parts of parenting after divorce or separation is dealing with your ex’s new partner. Whether you are divorced, just separated, or were never married, coping with this big change takes time and patience.

Many parents wonder if they can keep their child away from the new girlfriend or boyfriend.  Unless the new partner presents a danger to your child, courts are unlikely to order that the new partner is not allowed around the child.

A new partner is a difficult adjustment for everyone involved. Ideally, you and your ex would have the kind of relationship where you would tell each other about new partners and agree on a reasonable way to introduce your children to them. In reality, many divorced couples have difficulty communicating and are reluctant to involve the ex in such a personal matter.

If your ex has introduced your child to his or her new boyfriend or girlfriend, the best policy is to be calm, accepting, and encouraging when talking to your child. It will be best for everyone if your child can get along with the new partner. It’s likely you will have some feelings of resentment, anger, hurt, and sadness as your ex moves forward, but it is not helpful to express this to your child.

If you feel that the new person is your child’s life is creating some kind of problem for your child, try to talk with your ex about your concerns. If things get to the point where you believe your child is being mistreated or is in danger, then you need to talk to your attorney about what can be done to protect your child.

The Sampair Group is your family law advocate. We serve the Phoenix and Mesa areas and are ready to represent you with compassion and integrity.