“What If I Don’t Want A Divorce?”

DivorceThe decision to divorce is not always a mutual one. Ending a marriage isn’t usually a decision that is made overnight, and is instead a result of something that has been slowly building up. If your spouse has completely made up their mind that they want a divorce, it may not be in your best interest to attempt to legally fight or prevent the divorce if it’s not something you want. You do have the option of making a simple approach to saving your marriage. There are no guarantees that things will change and that the divorce will not happen, but if you have chosen to try and stop it by making drastic changes, now is the time to do it.

Understand and remember that you cannot control the decisions your spouse makes or how they respond to you and your attempts. The worst thing you can do is beg your spouse to stay. If your spouse has decided they want a divorce, chances are they have been feeling this way for a while and mentally preparing themselves to make a decision. The decision will be very fresh so it may not be the best time to grovel and apologize and push for marriage counseling if your spouse is resistant to the idea.

You can, however, try and slow down the process of divorce. In Arizona, you can file a petition for “Conciliation Court,” which puts the divorce on hold until you and your spouse have completed court mediation. Conciliation Counseling is offered by the Superior Court for married parties who are considering or are in the process of divorce. The brief counseling is geared toward assisting parties in making an informed and thoughtful decision regarding their marital relationship. If the couple expresses interest in community-based counseling services, they can continue with that option once the conciliation counseling is completed.

If your spouse accepts the Petition for Conciliation but has not yet filed for divorce, neither party may file for legal separation or dissolution of marriage for a 60-day period. If they have already filed for divorce before the Petition of Conciliation was submitted, the case may not be advanced until the 60-day “cooling off” period has expired.

The scheduled conferences for counseling are conducted by professional counselors and are held privately under confidence. The counselors use no coercion, and the couple makes any finals decisions regarding how to proceed with the divorce.

During and after this process, you must immediately stop pursuing the other person and give you and your spouse some space from each other. You must be willing to understand how you contributed to the breakdown of the marriage and what role you play in the problems between you and your spouse.

This is the time to start changing for the better and thinking about the things you have done that have led to your spouse feeling this way. Avoid blaming your spouse for everything if you want any chance at saving your marriage. Focus on their pain and loneliness.

Once you understand what you have done wrong, how you need to change it, made an attempt to change, and understand what your spouse is going through, you can prepare to apologize and discuss the matter further.

It is important to note that these kinds of approaches may not always put an end to a divorce. Once the divorce decision becomes final, it is important that you have legal representation from a spousal attorney in Glendale. Contact a professional attorney at The Sampair Group today to begin your case, whether you are the one filing for divorce or not.

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