Surviving the Last Holiday Before Divorce

divorce3Divorce filings typically rise dramatically in January. While it’s true that for some couples the holidays can bring their marital issues to the forefront and lead them to divorce, many couples decide long before mid-December that their marriage is over, yet put it on hold until they can get through the holidays. This is particularly common when there are children involved. Many parents want their kids to have one last family Christmas to remember. That can be easier said than done however. Getting through the holidays when you know your marriage is over can be painful and difficult.

To get through this tough time, follow these tips:

–        Talk to someone. Whether it’s a therapist, a friend, or a family member, you need someone you can unload onto as you try to hold it all together.

–        Set reasonable expectations. Don’t let yourself hope the holiday will heal your marriage and try not to expect the days to be magical and wonderful. Planning to get through it with as little trauma as possible is a reasonable way to approach it.

–        Create alone time. Finding ways to be away from your spouse will keep tensions to a minimum.

–        Make an agreement. If at all possible, try to hash out with your spouse exactly how you’re going to manage the holidays and surrounding events. Are you going to give each other gifts, go to each other’s family events, shop together for your kids? Figure it out in advance.

–        Put on a happy face. If your goal is to keep the news from your kids, you need to deploy your acting skills.

The Sampair Group handles divorce, custody, child support, spousal support, separations, annulments and all family law matters. We are located in Maricopa County, Arizona and are ready to work with you. Make an appointment today.