If you were divorced or separated this year, it may be the first time you will spend some or all of the holidays apart from your child. Although your parenting time agreement may be very fair, it is designed so that your child can spend time with both parents and this means sharing holidays. Your holiday schedule may have your child spending some major holidays with you and some with your ex. Coping with those holidays without your child can be challenging. Follow these strategies to get through this.
– Talk with your child. You will want to go over the schedule with your child and help him understand the plan. Explain that he will spend the day with the other parent and that although you will miss him, you will have other time together. Be positive and encourage your child to have fun. Don’t tell your child if you feel deeply saddened. You want your child to have positive feelings.
– Plan an alternate holiday. Maybe you can’t be with your child on the actual holiday, but you can plan your own special holiday for your next time together. Talk about what you will do together and how you will celebrate. It will give you both something to look forward to.
– Stay in touch. Talk to your child by phone or Skype the day of the holiday to stay connected. Even a quick call can help both of you feel happier.
– Have a plan. So you won’t be with your child on the holiday, but that does not mean you have to pretend the day doesn’t exist. Make plans with family or friends. If you can’t face that, do something special for yourself at home – order or make your favorite food and watch a great movie or game. This is also your chance to do something completely different. Maybe you’ve thought about working at a soup kitchen or taking a tropical getaway. There is nothing stopping you now from switching things up. Maybe you will create a new tradition.
When you need legal advice or representation for divorce or a custody case, you need the Sampair Group. Our attorneys serve the Mesa, Phoenix, and Glendale areas of Arizona. Contact our office for a convenient appointment.