Due to the recession and tough economic times, many couples that are in the middle of a divorce are finding that living in separate houses is a financially impossible option. More divorcing couples have to cohabit during the divorce process, resulting in much tension and conflict. After you’ve decided who will sleep in the bedroom with the flat screen TV, there are some ways to make life easier for you and your spouse while living together during a split.
Establishing a routine and being clear on “in” and “out” times may seem silly to some, but having a predictable schedule will make things easier and minimize contact with one another. Work out a routine where one of you handles household duties and gets to spend time with the kids in the morning, and one of you gets that time for the second half of the day. Let each other know when you will be coming and going so there are no surprises of one spouse suddenly showing up at home.
Work hard to be civil and practice basic, respectful roommate etiquette. Remember that your kids are watching interactions between the two of you, so learn how to privately handle any conflicts that may arise in a way that doesn’t affect their well-being. Along with this respect, be considerate as a “roommate” and be sure to pick up after yourself and behave respectfully.
One of the most important things to keep in mind is that you don’t want this to be a permanent situation, and you need to develop a plan and timelines for moving forward with the divorce or separation. It can be easy to fall into a comfortable routine of living together, and it may feel financially secure, but cohabitation should always be a short-term solution. Engage together in housing searches so that both of you stay focused on the ultimate goal of separating. Make a list fo goals you want to accomplish toward this in the coming months, such as get a new job, create a budget, and look for housing.
Make an appointment with a counselor together so you can discuss how to resolve conflicts that may arise while living together and proceed in a way that doesn’t negatively affect your children. Attending counseling sessions together will also give you a chance to more openly verbalize your needs while you are living together. Being clear about what you need clears the road for days ahead as more decisions needs to be made.
Living under the same roof during a divorce can be emotional and stressful. Along with this stress can come the burden of legal concerns that may arise during the divorce process. The experienced Phoenix Family Law attorney’s at The Sampair Group will handle your case’s specific needs with the goal of results in your favor. Contact us today for a free consultation.
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