No two people are the same, so when you find someone you get along well with, taking the next step towards a life together seems natural. But, as time passes, you may discover that some of the things that drew you to your partner are no longer charming or cute. When the routine of daily life sets in, it is quickly apparent that a making a relationship or marriage last takes a lot of hard work. Some couples are able to stand the test of time, while others are not able to go the distance. But just what makes it work for one couple, and not for another? The answer likely lies in the actions of both parties, but have you ever stopped to think about what role your actions play in your relationship?
Without even knowing it, here are six ways you may be killing your relationship:
● Keeping score: when you engage in behavior that keeps track of who has done what, and for whom, severe damage can be caused to your relationship. When you focus on what hasn’t happened rather than what has, you lose sight of why you were first drawn to your partner.
● Failing to communicate: you are not a mind reader, so don’t expect your mate to be one either. If you do not effectively communicate your needs, you are likely to be disappointed and resentful.
● Using information as a weapon: if you or your spouse constantly holds things over the other’s head, no progress in the relationship can be made. It is no fun to walk on eggshells, and that is just what will happen if you engage in blackmail or similar behavior.
● Transferring your feelings and emotions to your spouse: failing to own your emotions will stunt not only your own emotional growth, but that of your marriage. But, taking responsibility for your feelings will help both you and your mate to better understand one another and help you to build a strong foundation.
● Allowing the green eyed monster to take over: jealousy is usually the result of mistrust. If you find yourself getting jealous easily, it may be time for a deeper look at the root problem in your relationship.
● Ignoring problems: we all know sticking our heads in the sand doesn’t make problems go away. If you fail to resolve conflict when it arises, you are only setting yourself up for failure in the future.
There are other ways relationships end, and our approach is not to place blame but to help you reach solutions that allow you to move forward. If you are considering divorce, call our office for help.
For more information about marriage and divorce, consult a qualified legal professional. Let us put our experience to work for you. Call The Sampair Group in Phoenix and the West Valley today to schedule your appointment.