Divorce can happen when the parents are at any age, which means the children will be at any age. Adult children of parents going through a divorce will face a different set of challenges than if they were younger. Since child custody does not apply to someone older than 18, they will probably be more involved in the divorce and communicating with both parents. But since they are adult, they will also have their own life to deal with. Here are some tips on how to be a supportive adult child of divorcing parents while maintaining your own home and your own personal emotions.
Talk to both of your parents and don’t be hesitant to ask questions if there are things you need to better understand. If one parent has shared the news with you about the divorce, make sure the other one is aware of the decision before saying anything. It’s not your place to let the other parent know that their spouse is filing for divorce.
Be sensitive toward the decision that your parents are making and what they are about to go through. You may not have lived with them for a while and aren’t fully aware of the problems they are going through that have developed.
If your siblings don’t know about the divorce yet, wait until your parents have told them before you discuss it with them. Make sure they inform them as soon as possible so they don’t find out the wrong way from the wrong person. This is a decision that affects the entire family, and all should be informed and involved.
Make sure you have a solid line of communication with your siblings to discuss the divorce between your parents and agree to discuss things open and honestly without conflict and without taking sides.
Discuss with your parents, your siblings and your spouse to determine the best ways to tell your own children about their grandparent’s divorce. Consider the distance of living between them. If they are at risk of hearing the news from another relative or family friend, consider making time for a family meeting to share the news.
Explain to your children that it doesn’t change who their grandparent’s are and they will still love them the same. Encourage them to speak their mind and interact with them individually.
Make sure your parents know that you love them both but don’t want to feel pressured to take sides. Ask them to refrain from speaking poorly about the other around you, and discuss this with your siblings as well.
No matter what age, divorce is difficult for everyone involved. For more information on your legal rights in a divorce, contact a Glendale divorce attorney at The Sampair Group today.